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Old friends abandon me, it's just the routine politics of jealousy
 
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 Overall story discussion

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modernecstasy
luvnrock
theviper2288
Raine
marcuss
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Shauni
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DreamCatcher
Milo
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charlezmatthew
nicks18
Mr. Mike
Ecii
rando88
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orion91
Sabazius
Staile
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No Answer
xxdarrynashleyxx
painservedcold
ems
Kell
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nicks18

nicks18


Posts : 135
Join date : 2009-05-23
Location : The Pearl of the Orient Seas

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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 19, 2009 1:45 pm

Everything I could have possibly said was said, and then some. So all I am left is this phrase.

I am happy.
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Mr. Mike

Mr. Mike


Posts : 649
Join date : 2009-07-18
Age : 76
Location : Oakland, CA

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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 19, 2009 4:01 pm

dare de-vil wrote:
yes, i did spell that wrong. 'slash fiction' is a type a genre.

as far as the definition of wat porn is, yer right. it dusnt hav a definite meaning. but the sole purpose of porn is sexual entertainment/gratification. i dont write these stories 2 help ppl get off. as far as im concerned, these r romance stories, in a nutshell, which include sexual scenes. my stories r 4 the pure entertainment of reading, not 4 get ppl's rocks off. at the LEAST its POSSIBLE it COULD be considered by SOME as softcore porn, although i dont c it that way

well ill tell ya wat guys. insted of progressing the chapters in this story, 4 now, how bout i just delve deeper into the history of the characters & how they feel? its up 2 u guys. that sound ok?

w/in the next few chapters, i cud explain how nick has gotten so apparently "experienced" w/ other gay ppl. if that made ne sense at all. & also i cud do a chapter from taylors p.o.v & we cud c wats goin on up in his head
im a little afraid im going to get in trouble w/ u kell and i dont want 2 do that • getting n2 trouble is something im good at though Twisted Evil • so, the way i understand it so far, slash fiction is written by a fan of of a previously established story (TV, movie, novel, etc.) where the fan writes an alternate narrative using already established (usually) male characters, giving them a same-sex orientation • if that is accurate, for nick and taylor to be 'slash' they have to be characters previously drawn by another author of which you are a fan • picky picky picky Laughing

i get it that you dont write to only get people off, that your focus is the relationship which is more emotionally and romantically based, and therefore you dont regard it as porn • i can accept that • no problem • traditionally, though, when erotic fiction leads the reader into a scene which climaxes with a graphic description of orgasm, that is 'pornographic' by most ppls standards • whether it is the intention of the author or not, such material is often used by readers to 'get off' • traditionally the way that is avoided is to lead the reader into a sexual situation but then somehow move the reader/audience attention away from any sexual climax • an example is the story i put in the 'perv' thread i started • earlier on a solo orgasm is described but later boy on boy sex is either beyond the view of the narrator or, at the end, is left up to the imagination of the reader • in movies love scenes often fade to black or pan to the curtains or whatever leaving the rest to the imagination • i think this can be highly effective because sometimes when dealing with emotions it may be better to NOT know the graphic details of the sex • this is all just meant as food for thought • clearly nick and taylor has not yet become pornographic by this definition • but noah and jayden does early on

as for story development, id like you to continue writing it the way you have already • weve now entered a new phase in the relationship between the two main characters and this new phase will have consequences for both • if you can use those "consequences" to further build character, perhaps bringing in history by introducing secondary characters, that might work

WOW -- i cant believe im writing like i know what im talking about! • this is seriously weird for me! • i havent read anything or thought anything about narrative writing from a critical perspective in about 20 years! • THANK YOU for creating this forum and allowing me to participate • im learning a lot! • some of it i apparently knew already but didn't know i knew! • weird!! Surprised

most importantly i think a good writer has to follow his own instincts and write what feels right • it can be interesting to note what other ppl think about the story but ultimately a story belongs to its author • his baby • evry1 else WOULD write it different • which is precisely the point • THAT would be THEIR story • but a good story needs to be a personal relationship between the author and his narrative and his characters • only HE can bring THAT into existence • which is why a story is special • through it the author discovers his unique self and reveals it to the audience
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Kell
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Kell


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Jul 24, 2009 3:18 am

1. i skimmed over everything u wrote bcuz it was a lot & every1 here will tell u that i dont like reading long posts lol

2. even though i stand by my personal guidlines of wat porn is, i believe that if yers 2 also true, then whether or not its porn is left 2 the pesonal definition of each reader. if they use my stories 2 get off, is not only xtremely flattering 2 me, but its also their personal choice.

3. i 4get wat i was gona say here...lol
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Kell
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Kell


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Sep 10, 2009 12:11 am

new nat. i did mention how i wud go deeper into their past, so hopefully, the ending kinda gives sumthin away bout the next chapter.

im all ears
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ems

ems


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Sep 10, 2009 2:32 am

there was A spelling error, lol. anyways, i was kinda looking forward to Nick's past, i guess i'll have to wait. Ii liked the part where you didnt put their talk over the phone in another conversation, it was much better to read it that way. the mall thing was just unimportant (for me), i dont think that taylor is getting any comfortable with his sexuality as nick was hoping, that's was what i felt when i read this chapter... i hope i was not too harsh Rolling Eyes Shocked
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Sabazius

Sabazius


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Sep 10, 2009 5:17 am

I really enjoyed this chapter, it's a nice insight into how nick thinks. With regards to what e said, I think that different people show that they're comfortable in different ways, and maybe for taylor being gay doesn't have to mean being camp and enjoying clothes shopping. In fact it might be nice if, by the end of the story, not only will nick have taught taylor to be comfortable about his sexuality, but he will have learnt that there's not such a thing as gay behaviour, and not all gay people like to shop and hang out with girls. I don't know if kell was going for this, but nick is a bit of a stereotypical gay guy, whereas in my mind taylor will never be a flamboyant effeminate guy. Of course, I do agree that he's not yet comfortable with the fact that he's gay. Otherwise this plot would be heading in a completely different direction!
Kell, re: the ending, I'm intrigued. So far nick has been set up as having a bit of a perfect life - out to his family, comfortable in his skin, plenty of friends etc. He even managed to turn the guy bullying him into a close friend. It'll be fun to see where you go with this and where the perfect life falls down somewhat. As always, well written and fun. Keep it up :-)
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nicks18

nicks18


Posts : 135
Join date : 2009-05-23
Location : The Pearl of the Orient Seas

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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Sep 10, 2009 7:06 am

Time and distance apart can take its toll on a relationship but I feel that Taylor seems to be still taking a grudge against that stunt at the road last chapter. I hope he doesn't turn bitter on everything that's happening. Is any other reason why Taylor seems a bit elusive? Maybe. He just doesnt want/ cant say it to Nick in a way that would hurt ol'Nicky. Presumptions...
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Kell
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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Sep 10, 2009 4:31 pm

all noted. & e, by now u shud know that i take criticism very well. never worry bout being 2 harsh. & thanks u guys 4 putting in yer input
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ems

ems


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeSun Sep 13, 2009 11:19 pm

dare de-vil wrote:
e, by now u shud know that i take criticism very well. never worry bout being 2 harsh.

i do, but i will continue to worry Razz
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Kell
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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 12:38 am

new nat chapter posted. discuss here
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ems

ems


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 1:35 am

wow! in the beginning i was like, "must be a happy back story" or something like that, but im soo glad that it was far far from it. i somehow doubt that this Ted dude had anything but sex in his mind, but its pretty sad that he ditched Nick when he really really needed someone. i didnt think that cutting himself was exactly necessary but... i guess it kinda will make sense to some one who has been both outed and abandoned.
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painservedcold




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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 3:29 am

I like this chapter, alot. The whole backstory thing really worked for me since it showed off some of Nick's personality and why he does and acts in certain ways.
Spot on Kell.
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Sabazius

Sabazius


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 7:26 am

**puts on reviewer hat**
Of course, no story is complete without a heavy dose of depressive backstory! Lol
A great chapter, your written style is great as usual:
Quote :
I spread my whole hand out over his chest,
feeling it rise with each breath he took in. I felt intoxicated by the
male anatomy all of a sudden. His skin was so smooth & warm.
loving this Very Happy
Anyway, it's a nice development on the character. The only thing is, it kinda makes me wonder how much he's really forgiven Taylor, who took a heavy part in the struggle that he went through. Is he really cool with him now? I could see there being a lot of unresolved issues there, but maybe that's something you saw as being an area that they covered in one of the periods not explicitly written about - or maybe he's just over it and I'm being a fool. Still, I'd like your input on this one Kell.
Anyway, great stuff, keep it up!
**removes reviewer hat**


Last edited by Sabazius on Fri Oct 30, 2009 7:27 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : witticisms etc)
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ems

ems


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 10:49 am

Sabazius wrote:
The only thing is, it kinda makes me wonder how much he's really forgiven Taylor

he had problems with taylor? or did you just aget mixed up with ted nd taylor?
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Sabazius

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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 1:41 pm

Quote :
I had been getting constant abuse from my schoolmates, like Anthony
Becker, Brian Bell, Jackson Frankl & Taylor Klipps. They pushed,
shoved, kicked, slapped, laughed at, hated, harassed, humiliated me. I
hated them.
That there be our boy Taylor. Of course, he's not going to be cool with Ted, but I would think he'd still have residual issues with Taylor that would need to be resolved. But now that I think about it, maybe a confrontation scene between Nick and Ted, or Taylor and Ted, would be interesting... what do you think Kell?
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Kell
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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 4:01 pm

ohhhh i intend a confrontation. i planned out the confrontation b4 i even started writing nat. i planned it out wen i had wrote chapter 5 in tac lol. i wont hint at watll happen, but i think/hope u guys r gonna like it


gracias 4 the feedback
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ems

ems


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 4:18 pm

that sounds like nick is going to put his heart and soul into it, i think its necessary too.
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Kell
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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Oct 30, 2009 4:27 pm

mhm
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charlezmatthew




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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Nov 12, 2009 9:42 pm

It makes me sad that there's you haven't added on to this.. I want more! This story could be sexxxxxxxxy !
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painservedcold




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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Nov 12, 2009 9:59 pm

Here that Kell? No rest for the weary, you have readers to please!
Seriously, we love your chapters, keep them coming as you're able to do so man
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Kell
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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeThu Nov 12, 2009 10:29 pm

HOPEFULLY in 2 weeks ill hav a new nat up. i still hav a tac 2 do & u guys know that TYPICALLY i write 1 chapter/week. i rly wanna change that though
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Sabazius

Sabazius


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeFri Nov 13, 2009 1:38 pm

charlezmatthew wrote:
It makes me sad that there's you haven't added on to this.. I want more! This story could be sexxxxxxxxy !
I totally agree! BTW, welcome to the forum, we love new members, please introduce yourself in the intro thread, hope you stick around, my name's Alex, blah blah blah. But really, hi! Very Happy
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Kell
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Kell


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeWed Nov 25, 2009 2:17 am

there be a neweth chapter up. discusseth hereth
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ems

ems


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeWed Nov 25, 2009 3:27 am

a whole chapter on an AIM convo? pretty KewL idea! nice to know that Nick didnt go back to his life and live on as if nothing happened. that would have been pretty lame. im just hoping that we get to know more about this Mark dude. cheers
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ems

ems


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PostSubject: Re: Overall story discussion   Overall story discussion - Page 5 Icon_minitimeWed Nov 25, 2009 6:36 am

NO FUCKING WAY!!!! not that mark!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
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