Story Discussion

Sabazius wrote:

painservedcold wrote:

So much fluff. Oh my god, the fluff...

Kell. You make your characters say and do the sweetest things sometimes, and it comes off as completely believable not just because that's how you built the characters, but I think also because you make the readers *want* them to be that way. You have a talent for making people identify with your characters and want them to succeed and overcome whatever obstacles you put in their lives. And in this case, it helps us believe in the love you created between Travis and Connor.

This speaks to you as a person as well. I'll refrain from saying too much, lest we need to blow our noses with pancakes to get the sap off. But I just want to say that the poem had to come from somewhere. Even if the last part was Fleetwood Mac, you wrote the rest of it, and if you can write that for a fictional character, then it speaks wonders to the creative spirit inside you, and what's more, it speaks to how much love you're capable of giving to another person. I've said this to you before, but one day you will make someone feel like the most important, beautiful, special person in the world.

Brilliantly done Kellen, don't change who you are, don't change how you write. Bravo.

THIS. ABSOLUTELY THIS.
Also I loved the Fleetwood Mac

<3

thanks guys! and alex, do i get a review from u..?

dare de-vil wrote:

thanks guys! and alex, do i get a review from u..?

I thought he agreed with mine?

yes but i have high standards for alex-reviews. a ditto doesnt do it.

Usually I give an in-depth review, but this chapter was so good that everyone else got there first! There's not a thing I would change and I've got nothing to say that hasn't been said already by the others. You're writing so well I can't review it!

umm.....yay

chaptah 24 is up & at 'em

So, ummmm. Connor's kinda horny today...I wonder if that has anything to do with the author?

Interesting thing for Convis to fight over, seeing as though its their first fight and they haven't had anything really bad happen yet. Connor is right though, coming out really is something that should be left up to him to do, I won't hammer through something we had a whole thread on, but coming out IS personal.

I thought it was really precious that Connor was afraid that he wasn't going to see Travis as much because of the job. It's an interesting insecurity to think about, especially for younger gay males who may not be as willing or used to expressing those kinds of feelings to people. But that conversation about how we allow gay males, or males in general, to express their emotions is something we can take elsewhere.

I appreciate the realism in your characters Kell, which is why I don't like how they made up after the fight so quickly. I would have thought they'd be upset at each other's words for a little while longer.

in my opinion, this was the first fight ive done where both arguments seem realistic & where (if i wasnt the author) i wouldnt be sure who to side with cuz they both make valid points.

i was iffy about deciding whether or not i wanted it to end on a sour note. ending it sourly would mean, since its resolve would happen in the future, it was a fight that affected them both enough to be upset for quite some time. and yeah, it was their first fight, but looking at the general fight, its not the caliber of something that would affect them in the long run. i mean, holding a grudge against ur boyfriend for embarrassing u in front of ur boss, or them outing you to a stranger is something to FIGHT about, but not something that would hurt their relationship in the long run: its simply not enough of a big deal. in my opinion

Connor's fault!!! That's all I'm saying.

Not bad Kell, but it was kind of a let down after an awesome chapter in NAJ.

ok? lol

and whats connors fault?

Kell wrote:

ok? lol

and whats connors fault?

Everything that's wrong with the universe, apparently.

LMAO

The content of this whole chapter is Connor's fault lol and if he didn't do what he did, we wouldn't even have had anything to read.

i almost feel like answering for connor...lol

new chapter is up. lets talk about it

I wonder what it is that Travis is thinking about. It obviously affected him really deeply in an emotional sense, I suspect someone important died that way to him

hmmm innerestin'

Travis thinks that the whole debacle is his fault. Classic martyr syndrome don't you think?

Anyway, good job kell. I mean, I know that they ice was going to crack when Connor was walking away from Travis but you did manage get me closer to my screen so that I could make sure that I was reading what was happening correctly. (Y)

wow...ive never had a compliment like that before. thanks

in the spirit of valentines day, i decided to scrap wat i originally had planned to write & have decided to put that off in favor of this valentines chapter. go read & come talk!

Wow, wasn't that cute? Very well done Kell. Nice and dandy.

thunks!

Collin looks so hot in my head. Haha.

i think u mean connor